Monday, September 28, 2009

a lesson on using spoons and forks

uh yeah its about table manners(no its not :P) first of all i would lyk to say sorry for all my shrieking fans out there who has waited so long for a new post for me..

Ok stop crying guys its not that emotional,so i wasnt blogging coz of(well no reason actually,i was just lazy..hhehe) alright so i wanna make this blog a special one so im gonna give you a special one, first all of you should click HERE,next i want u all to (well i havent done this part yet so uh) wait for my next blog post,cya around

Sunday, September 27, 2009

my rolemodel,the one and only:pocoyo

guys in this post i wanna tribute this post to the legend,the one who made my life,the dude who has it all:Pocoyo(lol not true i dedicated my life and i'll give my life to the one and only Jesus Christ)

so Pocoyo was really inspiring,he was like the father I never expected to be a four year old,before i knew pocoyo i had no life(uh yeah like it makes any difference to now :P)i watch teleteubbies,i liked power ranger,i look up to popeye(lol he made me eat spinach,i though i was gonna have buffy arms like he did *flashbacks every second i ate a spinach*) I saw pocoyo's greatness when my dad installed playhouse disney for my tv. Pocoyo inspired me he made me a better person(hehehehehe no he didnt :P, God did)he has cute animal friends like Pato(a freaky duck,please be my pet),Elly(a pink elephant,i dunno what species are pink elephants,sorry,im sure theyre related to pink panther)Loula(just a puppy nothing more) and Sleepy-Bird(the name says it all) those cute animals who doesnt seem to exist in this little blue ball called earth are the friends of Pocoyo,what makes it interesting is that Pocoyo and those guys are 3D,unlike us who(well i dont know what our dimension is called so lets call it Human-D)

So Pocoyo taught me that its okay to be a pre-school,be proud of it(lol these words are coming out from a Freakartian for your own safety dont listen)you still can wear diapers,enjoy every moment of it(want me to go on and on and on and on and on and on and on 10X about what i just talked about??)uhh well thats about it i close this post in about 3...2....1....0,8...0,7....0,5.....(i skipped 0,6??yea no one cares XP)alright lets just close i dont wanna waste your 6 hours time
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Thursday, September 24, 2009

the wise words of a freakartian

okk just showered myself under water thats just colored yellow(no its not urine please dont even think)alright little ones im gone a tell u guys bout the language of a freakartian,yea we do use the finger sometimes but thats only when we wanna show love or affection,heres the list of words(yes with the meaning boneheads)
-MeeGaaa:I/Me
-WASSAPP:hello
-GIVE UP DE MONEY:wanna be friends??
-WHOSYOURDADDY:dude gotta go bye
-*shows middle finger*FAK YOU!!:hey man wanna buy some sugar??
-PUT DE MONEYYY IN DE BAGG!!PUT IT IN:hey u guys still love spongebob right??
-FKPAWNIHATEUTOOMAN!!:brb gotta go to de toilet
-WHATSZITTOOYA:alright guys i still love barney n im proud :P
well im not teaching u guys for free so call me at 1-DONT-W4NN4-TEACH-YOU-VITONESE-0KAY?

a seriously >insert fancy word here< quiz that concerns the brains of a martianmaid

so my friend mandy ermm Amanda told me some interesting facts about her single minded,low IQ,idiotic,simple brain idiotica(wait i did say idiot before)goofy(want me to continue??i can keep going on and on and on and on and on and on about the idiot i mean uh maid??)foolish,non-brained(seriously im even asking my self to stop,if i keep going on and on and on and on and on and on it'll take away 12 hours of your precious time(heh like i care))so basically she's a moron and im gonna tell you why:
1.she doesnt know her mothers name-MAJOR LOL
2.Celebrates 3 birthdays in a year-Yes she wait not she,IT does
3.Ask her her b'day,she'lll say shee was born in 2009,ask her the same question next year,she'll answer 2010
4.She skips 3 while counting 1-10
5.she cant tell the difference between a 6 and a 9 lol
6.ask her about her salary per month,she'll say 5 thousand rupiah or recently 5 million rupiahs
7.SHES IDIOTICER THAN A FREAKARTIAN
huehue so next time when bump into manda do tell her to fire the maid :D

The Heavy adventures of the peniban(my two big sis u know this one right??:D:D)

okk so tonite this Freakartian who has no life,still lives with his mom will tell all of you(yea you the one reading this time-wasting,useless,crappy post)the Heavy adventure of the peniban,soo this peniban was a legendary(legendary??o.O more like heavyandery)earth people who loves to to sit on,stand on,sleep on,put its weight on,belly flop on little"cute" boys,poor little boys..theres this one boy who the beast loves and worships very much but i dont wanna give out the name :P
okk so this is the whole story:
Once upon a time(heh yea for all of u my fans asking me where did i get that charming intro,i got it from google :D) there lived a 1000kg woman-beast named UH.I.FORGOT.HER.NAME,her hobby is to drag little cute boys into her swamp in there(yea there,*points finger to your grandpa's backyard*)and sit on those poor little boy's faces,theres this one boy who survived his name was DOES.IT.MATTER.WHAT.WAS.HIS.NAME.IFORGOT.SO.DONT.ASK!!(thats a bit long for someone who has a long name so lets call him unknown),so unknown was buying some milk for his sick Guinea Pig team (G-Force??) suddenly this hideous creature dragged him to hell(thats a parody from drag me to hell lol)wait not hell,to her swamp there,then the creature saw his devilish(cute)face so she decided not to sit on him,instead marry him,if he doesnt the fatso ermm,creature will sit on him face forever and ever (HALELUYA,HALELUYA)...
so unknown had to marry him,rather than suffer forever and ever(HALELUYA,HALELUYA)on their wedding day,unknown was cold sweating,he said "istri gw 1000kg??gila aja"(poor guy)so he decided to kill himself rather than marry the fat womenn ermm i mean beast-woman,so he took a knife from the wedding cake and stabbed his own heart(u guys wanna see the pic??click here :D)so the creature saw his bleeding future husband and the creature cried in sorrow and sat on the dead husband's face(for like 12 hours)and the creature died of watchamacolic(sat on a cute boy for too long)and they all died in pieces...

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

How a Freakartian survives against the deadly trial of flying pencils and erasers(SCHOOL)

BANANAS!!(it means Hi in Vitonese)
in this (idk what this is actually its too crazy for a post) umm episode..(yea episode would be nice)
im gonna explain what a Freakartian would do when SCHOOL comes to life..
this is like a Freakartian's survival blog,a freakartian couldnt live without this blog(LOL just like Gerard and Cholesterol)soo uhh Freakartians,they usually play UNAS..a really popular card game from Vitotunus,im gonna show how to play later(in like...5 years)wait what was this episode about??oh right about what Freakartians would do in School,im just gonna make a list and summarize:
-fight a giant monster sent by the villain Doctor Saber the monster is usually a Benus Beetrap
-punch imaginary targets sent by Master RCF we have to do a Baju Cuci dulu
-Answer flying number questions from Madam Ballack, the numbers are usually shaped Albebra
-Run around Vegas with Sir Totok Ferguson
-Answer really Hard stuffs from the evil Scientist Genius Mister Pardon
-make girls fall in love with a freakartian's "charming" face
-laugh with the friendly niceguy,Mr.Indriana Hones
-mock this freakier than human species called "Kim Doo Been"
well thats pretty much what a freakartian would do,if u see one,dont call him gay

A life decision about frozen yoghurts

so i start the day off with my home made dog omellete,a golden retriever dog egg to be precise,a bull's testicle and a tarantula sashimi(the tarantula was still alive,its the normal diet for a Freakartian)thenn i was overjoyed to see that malaysia was voted as the worst country on earth,Congratz u copycats XD soo like thats not important,so my goot friend mandy ermm manda decided to join this year's school wrestling competition(YEA WELCOME TO THE CLUB*gets out my mighty fist*)and this year n next year we hav 2 destinations,The country near the shittiest country on earth,singapore,and the country of the dreams of a freakartian,New Zealand..so we went on and on and on and on and on and on 10X about which wrestling competition is she gonna join,we chat here in this wall post,click here,no wait,here..no no wait here,then we came up with a conclusion,i should make a post out of this HAHAHAHAHAHA(srsly u dont want me to continue laughing,it'll waste your precious 5 hours)so this is the post about the wrestling decision(ignore the frozen yogurt,it doesnt even connect to this)...
soo uhh tell your friends bout my blog coz if u think its funny now,it wont be any funnier than now..btw listen you lil 13 years old,WRESTLING IS NOT I REPEAT NOT FAKE,soo if u guys wanna kill somebody with this martial art then go on i wont mind XP
bye,and yea manda,im gonna make another post TONIGHT

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

My GGF(ghostly gay friend)"this idea was given by my big sis,your awesome sis :)

KAMIKAZE!!(in my old planet Vitotunus this was the style to say hello and people usually runs away from me,good planet...)so like this is about my GGF,so in year 1989 i was saving people from monster BIGALO(big inbrainless giant acreature living on earth)(where did i get that??no idea :P)soo i was killing this piece of trash when suddenly my GGF says "jalan di taman yok"and i was like WTFOMG gw kan jwb "gw lgi bunuh monster,lu gk liad apa??"n then he teleports the mosnter to hell and takes me to the park,when we were walking he said "woy my hero,gw gnteng gk??"then gw jawab"hah elo??cakepan gw kan??"n then dia lngsung bles"iy,cui jgn bilang sapa2..gw gay"OMJ..n i was cold sweating(KERINGET DINGIN!! LOL)i was thinking gw di homoin gk ya ama dia,then God's grace came when a white gay ghost pulled him to the gate of hell and i flew away to the white house where i lived and then i said,"I AM LEGEND"
mission complete

Part 2 of my live as a Freakartian(my friend came up with this lol cool huh??yea i know shut up)

ok so at the year 2000 my friends started calling me a martian coz of my weird six pack and tattoos(six pack!!tattoos??!)truz my friends started calling me gay coz im super handsome and i stabbed em with a knife coz thats what i do(so u know what'll happen i u fackking call me gay)did i spell the f word wrong??aww idc soo at 2003 i played guitar with slash,he's an idiot,but he's cool coz he breaks a guitar in half with a sword..gk nyambung ya??iy gw tau koq nnti nyambung
so later in 2007 i met michael jackson and danced with him,he said "Maldini you freak!!!gimme back my dollar!!"yea i knew he loved me but i had to go coz my private jet pilot cant wait to go to china,so i parachuted to china and talked to jackie chan in chinese said "CHONG CHONG CHING CHONG"he answered"CHONG CONG F*CK U MALDINI!!!"i was like what??then i had to jetpack back to indonesia.So this year,im fight a godzilla..wiish me luck ladies

Part 1 of the live of an earthmartian

ok so basically this post is about my really fun life as an earthmartian/freak/geek
so like i came to this earth when i was like 0,my mother got me out of her stomach..thx mom :D
so i learned to walk n run at the age of 1/2 which is pretty normal for an earthmartian..so like anyways i learned to talk at the age of like what 2/2?oh wait thats 1 lol,(im just here to make my friend laugh so uhh yeay you guys can laugh too)n in 1999(lol love that year)i won the first guitar hero competition which is really special for someone like me i mean i still sleep with my mom lol
so uh thats part 1 of my life

Second Post,requested by a good friend of mine hahaa

alright earth people in this post,gw bkal ceritain ap yg gw lakukan hri ini..
so today i just went to this umm place called BSD,100 degrees fahrenheit,country Indonesia,low hygiene,anyway theres this place called ocean park and im gonna pay em a visit "gets out double barrel shotgun" 200% water,oohhh damn,its rily crowded,masuk aj susah gila,so aku gk jdi ke situ n instead we went to this sh*hole called ITC BSD,suspected to be in Indonesia,sooo we smashed the doors and shouted "PUT DE MONEY IN THE BAG!!!PUT IT IN!!"and so like we took all the cash and got out using my private jet end of post

Hi Earthlings..

greetings..
i am the earth creature(human :P)named Vito Maldini..
gw org Indonesia,the best country in da world(yeah..right)
so uh more details about the me
-i DONT smoke(follow me,sehat loh :D)
-i talk in a british accent(LOL)
-weird things are normal to me and normal things are freaky to me
- i fought a bear twice(once in a dream,once in a game)
-I never did that in the bed..
-SUSHI LOVER!!
-guitar freak
-people ask me if im gay,i answered by stabbing them with a knife :)
-I live in this like little ball called earth,u should check it out ^^
-Im actually italian,but my dad doesnt approve
-yes im doing this coz of insomnia and boredom
-am i gonna update this blog again??you decide!!